If I had a dime for every job I’ve had where I didn’t feel appreciated or inspired, every boy I’ve spent way too much time on, every night I’ve laid awake thinking about how I’m doing too much or not nearly enough, I’d have a whole mess of dimes that I could throw at people.

I’m thinking I’m probably not alone here.

What do you do when when you’ve really mucked it up this time, when an important relationship is strained, when your body just isn’t having it, when money is tight, when you’re doing great work and your boss doesn’t care, when your future is uncertain?

I’ll tell you what my natural response is: a Bojangles Cajun Filet Biscuit and Hulu by myself.

I isolate. I withdraw. I talk to food about my problems. But, sometimes I can muster just a shred of self-discipline. And in practicing it and believing in it, I muster it a tiny bit easier.

So here you go.

18 Ways to Practice Happy When You Hate Everything:

1. Allow yourself to feel all your feelings without judgement. Even the uncomfortable ones like resentment and sadness.
2. Go outside and move your body around. (Pro tip: I’ve found that I am 8 times more likely to run if I put my shoes on.)
3. Drink water.
4. Drink tea.
5. Sleep.
6. Congratulate yourself for anything at all. Did you brush your teeth like a goddamn champion? Twice today? That deserves a high five!
7. Read a book with pages.
8. Spend time with healthy people. Good friends will remind you who you are.
9. Imagine yourself as the protagonist of a critically acclaimed cult comedy and pee your pants laughing at the absurdity of your life.
10. Train your brain to recognize the good stuff and vocalize your appreciation.
11. Engage in something creative. Make something even if it sucks.
12. Eat real food with colors.
13. Cry like a big, fat, ugly baby.
14. Put your laundry in the washer. Then forget about it for 36 hours. Wash it again. Dry that laundry. Stuff it all, unfolded, in a box. Convince yourself that the wrinkles will fall out with your body’s own heat. Move on with your life.
15. Make a tiny, little plan that you can follow through on.
16. Put a time limit on how many minutes you’re going to devote to saving the world or figuring out your life today.
17. You don’t have to be crazy to talk to a therapist. But who are we kidding. You’re probably crazy. Go talk to a therapist.
18. Mitigate bullshit. Stop saying yes to everything. Dial it back. Invest in the stuff that is worth your time. Prioritize kindness. Prioritize life giving experiences and people. In the words of Howard Thurman, “Don’t ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive and go do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”